They say that dog owners start to look like their dogs. I’m not sure if that’s true, but I do see some similarities between my dog and me.
We currently live in a place that has a LOT of rabbits. They’re everywhere. And she’s obsessed with them.
I take her for a walk, she sees a rabbit, and she stands there staring at it, refusing to move, until I either scare the rabbit away or it moseys along.
What’s funny about this is that she’ll be fixated on a rabbit ten feet away and there will be another one sitting three feet away to her left. But she’s so focused on the first one she saw that she doesn’t even realize that there’s another rabbit closer to her.
How does this apply to me or to dating?
Well, I think I do this a lot when it comes to men. I’ll meet some guy and he’ll catch my interest and I get so fixated on that guy that I’ll completely overlook another guy who comes along after him.
I had this happen in school. I really liked Guy A. (We were good friends and spent a lot of time together, so I wasn’t completely misguided in my interest.)
(In hindsight, I was somewhat misguided since he wanted a non-cussing good Catholic girl who never wore jeans or drank too much. Which is so not me. Fuck that shit.)
I was also friends with Guy B and had thought about him as a possibility, but Guy A had so captured my attention that I didn’t really think about Guy B. By the time Guy A disappeared and I got around to thinking about Guy B, he was engaged. There went that opportunity.
That’s just one of many examples.
I think it’s easy to meet someone and either be really attracted to them or really click with them and start to ignore other possibilities. Sometimes that’s a good thing, because there are certain people you won’t get unless you’re 100% committed to getting them.
But it’s a very, very bad idea if they don’t reciprocate your interest. That’s the way to spend a few weeks or months missing out on actual dating opportunities.
So, to all the daters out there, keep your eyes and your mind open to other possibilities. Especially if you’re not gaining traction with the person who seem PERFECT.
(No one is, by the way. And, for the guys especially, just ’cause she’s pretty, doesn’t mean she’s a good match for you…)